I Cried Finishing this Book
Today I finished “Shoe Dog” by Nike founder Phil Knight, the decades-long story of a man with a vision and an unstoppable drive to not lose.
It’s an amazing memoir, chronicling Knight’s journey from importing Japanese Onitsuka Tiger to being forced to pivot into Nike to scaling a global brand and eventually taking it public, with all of the rollercoaster moments of entrepreneurship.
As I wrapped up the last few pages, I lost it, tears streaming from my eyes.
The memoir touches on something deep inside of me, an emotional soft spot for the specific plot elements of perseverance, duty, honor, the underdog and pursuit.
The journey for the sake of the journey.
A passionate pursuit of a vision.
The rollercoaster, the risks, the strategy, the bets, the wins, the losses.
The game.
Playing the game not knowing what winning looks like…
…but playing not to lose.
And continuing to play the game all the way through until the end.
Finishing the book, I was overwhelmed with a flood of emotion.
Resonance, inspiration, respect and longing.
The story arch is one I’ve admired for as long as I can remember.
The hero of the story pursues his vision despite all of the setbacks, forging forward through the trials, not for the sake of victory, but for the sake of duty.
Stories with heroes, real life heroes who endured, persevered, suffered but kept going, always hit home.
I first realized this soft spot while watching The Greatest Showman where P.T. Barnum endures countless obstacles and setbacks to bring his vision of the circus to life. I teared up at the end.
In the Darkest Hour, Churchill faces one of the toughest decisions: to square off with Hitler or negotiate. He trusts himself, stands by his decision, fights for his decision and in the end emerges victorious. Tears.
This is also the plotline of my grandfather and his tireless pursuit of blazing a self-defined trail through a lifelong rollercoaster of success and failure, always onward, while committing to those less fortunate. So many tears.
The Hero’s Journey.
But today, finishing the book, this theme hit differently.
At this moment, I don’t feel aligned with this story arch.
A month into Corona, a business with an uncertain future, no employees, no cofounders, an uncertain path ahead, I don’t feel like I’m living up to my aspirations of the men in these stories. I feel lost, uncertain, off-path.
It’s a feeling, a deep one, one diverted from usual feelings of confidence, unshaken certainty and infinitely opportunistic optimism.
But now, not.
I know it’s part of the Hero’s Journey, often called The Abyss. I know I have to keep going, to fight through it, to find the elixir and return home.
That’s why I’m reading memoirs and biographies, to remind myself that this is part of the story, that all hero’s go through this, that this is what makes the hero.
